Today

Today I meant to write about looking for inspiration for my spring house makeover, but then I learned about passing of someone who was and wasn’t a member of my family. Was, because as a partner of my brothers for 19 years she was a stable point on the family landscape. Wasn’t because of very difficult relationship with our parents we never got close.And now we never will. Still sudden death touched my family, so I wanted to write couple words about her as I remember her. And thank her for being this huge part in my brothers life. Dalia was his rock, something I never understood until I met my husband. I never appreciated how dependent people can be from each other. When we first met, I was a difficult teen with many issues, they were adultsĀ  (my brother being 6 years older than me and Dalia was a bit older than him) so we didn’t have much in common, but I still remember that my first set of artist pastels I got from her. Then after 2 years this huge rift in our family happened (mainly out of our parents fault, never being able to understand how their children can be so much different thatĀ  them), and by the time I became who I am as a adult whole relation was so damaged, that there was no trust. And it is something I will always regret.
Something telling about our family is that, I learned about Dalias passing form my brothers blog, not from him calling anyone he is related to. We spoke today and I really feel for him, but I am completely powerless to help him in anyway.
So I am typing away trying to deal with my own emotions, as now from perspective of my marriage, I know what they meant for each other. And don’t even want to imagine how I would feel in his place.
Anyway, all I want to say is thank you to Dalia, for being who she was for Jacek. And to my brother that the pain won’t go away but I hope you can live with it. For sake of doing things you both started and planned. I like to think she would like you to stick to it.